A few weeks back there was a diet-specific IG influencer that caught my attention. She had decided to let go of the rigidity of her diet and allow more flexibility – like fruit. (Yeah, allowing fruit…). When I saw that she was headed in this new “I’m going to listen more to my body,” and “let go of the rigidity of the rules,” I was like, “Hells yeah, girl! Welcome!” Unfortunately, it was short-lived.
Like clockwork, I saw more and more posts claiming loss of “control,” increased “emotional eating,” and dreaded gained weight. Soon she was back on the diet and calling out anti-dieters. Three weeks. Three weeks is all it took for her to give up on her internal cues and go crying back to her diet. Now she’s promoting a 4 week, product-sponsored, weight loss challenge.
Hrumph.
Why do we do this? Why do we play this diet cycle game?
“Anti-diets saying DIETS DON’T WORK, but here I am X pounds heavier and going back!”
Diets do work…at keeping you stuck.
At keeping you from:
-
- Enjoying an ice cream cone with your kid
- Going out to drink with friends
- Sharing popcorn with your husband at the movies
- Using that brain power for more than counting macros/calories/points
- Pursing other interests because this is your “something to do”
…and so on.
Often during the beginning of the Intuitive Eating process, you can experience what’s called, “honeymoon eating.” After dieting and restricting for so long, then giving it permission to eat without rules, stipulations, and conditions – what would you expect? It’s not a loss of control. It’s completely expected.
This is a time where you have to be more compassionate, understanding, and curious with yourself. Not go running back to a diet, which we’re all too quick to do.
What to do instead? Simply put – come from a place of curiosity.
Ask yourself:
1- Are you eating this because you actually want it or because before it was off-limits before?
2 – Where are these feelings of anxiety, stress, apprehension coming from?
3 – Am I focusing too much on the scale? Why does this number impact me this way?
What most people letting go of diets fail to realize when embracing Intuitive Eating is that the honeymoon phase ends. It’s not forever. You’re not going to eat and eat and eat till you’re the size of a house. That’s what diet culture makes you believe and what’s reinforced when you go through these cycles. I highly suspect this “influencer” was doing all this for promoting her new program while also trying to put down IE with all the attention it’s been garnering lately.
If you’ve been restricting in the form of dieting, your weight can fluctuate. It’s perfectly normal. Your body is pretty smart, but takes time to trust you again. When you know that food will no longer be restricted physcially or mentally, it will no longer react in the all-or-nothing manner. Food just becomes food.
That cookie in the office kitchen just becomes a cookie. You can have it if you want it. You can pass on it because you don’t, not because a diet its telling you that it’s forbidden. See the difference?
There will be calm. The weight will steady and settle, often not where you fear. You won’t feel out of control.
It’s just on the other side of patience and curiosity.
You can exist without the pursuit of weight-loss. Your diet is not your identity. The scale doesn’t measure your worth. And no, you don’t need to fall for that “See, I tried IE for 5 mins and I told you so” diet program, because you know better.
Photo by Daria Shevtsova from Pexels
